i guess there goes another night without talking about my thoughts. there’s quite a few things i’d like to talk about, but right now is not the time. i gave myself the chance to calm down a bit. there’s a lot weighing on my heart. also youth was great tonight. it always gets me thinking. i’m hurt about a lot of things, a lot that’s just things that are out of my hands and that is life. it sucks, and i’m not trying to control them or anything like that, but it still does hurt. i just want to push that aside. the stinging in my chest whenever i think about it. i just have to push aside.
in other news, it means the world to me when my friends show me that they are there. for me it’s always been hard to talk to people about my problems, but when people reach out, as much as i fight it, i do know they care.
that’s all the thoughts i have. tonight was calming in a way, fresh in a way, bittersweet in a way, sad in a way. i’m so excited for the entire day tomorrow though… i’m just not looking forward to that stinging in my chest because i know i’ll feel it.